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He called me a couple times the next week M-F Dec 13-17, but I either was not in or the arrangement could not be made. I left for DC the next Friday Dec 17 + didn't get back till Tues evening Dec 21. I was going to leave Weds eve for SF so I wrote him a note apologizing for not seeing him, + for not letting him know I was going. But it hinted strongly at the fact I have no direct way to get ahold of him. Anyway I went out at 2AM to put it on his car. But I couldn't find it. I was quite pissed. So next day I wrote a nasty addition on the front of it + had it put in his mailbox.

[Note added later] So I was neutral at best toward living in ABQ during 2nd 1/2 of Dec. [/note]

I could not have heard from him through now but I hope I do when I get back to ABQ. I want to see him at least one last time.

I guess I have learned this. Put your lover at the forefront and don't let anything get in front. Also I should have let Chip know my feelings + also try to evoke his at