Page 166

So sad I couldn't talk to Tom Rosenburg. Tried talking with El Paso guy with buck teeth; cute but no Chip.

So went home so unhappy + shot down but not knowing why. I thought about it all as I fell asleep. Then woke up at 3:30 and coun't get back to sleep till 6.

I started thinking the usual lack of communication stuff + I kept thinking what I would say to him if he ever phoned. Nasty stuff. But then I recalled he had said he only wanted to be friends, last Dec. + I accepted this but it didn't sink in.

I asked myself why I was hurt as seeing them dancing + seeing them walk in together. It wasn't so much because of them but because I simply want to be in love with someone. It doesn't