Page 103

to go. It would be tremendous growth to learn to negotiate (what I thought FIN was?) well and to understand all that stuff and the interplay of morals/law/money. I would really love to learn that stuff. I could write off my hard work on COBOL as a way to get in here and a way to pay for HBS. But, as they say, Finance is not place for poets, which I may be. But it could be a good business-side, to offset a "soft" social side. I like pin-stripe suits. I like the whole aura of money.

But now I owuld lose the fun and creativity of R&D. But has that been lost already. What about responsiveness to peoples needs through marketing. That's fun. But the solutions can be so make-shift. But I don't have to implement them. High level negotiation would suit ego. There would be tremendous competition in the FIN/BGIE/BP area. And I have such dubious strengths there.

Remember tennis: screwup at first. Failures are real. Then compete. Eventually you get to point where you feel you are there. You can do it. But some things never change. You're just not very smart verbally. And marketing just fucks you up. And 4 times/week! Being "Rigorous" in MKG is inconsistent.