p.

Letter No. 14

Thursday 28 May 42

Major. J. H. Massey
6, Palestinian Coy, The Buffs
W. E. 7.

My own darling lovely Barbara,

At last we have a happy anniversary to celebrate
even though I am very unhappy that we cannot be
together on Max's first birthday. I have had congrat-
ulations from Ben & various people in the Coy. &
Burstein was kind enough to telephone - they
all say that they hope I will be home for his
next one. Hope! My God, I really thought that
there was any doubt about it. I don't know what I
should do. But believe me my darling I am thinking
of you today & of Maxie & very laughlingly. And remembering
how brave you were & how many difficulties
& inconveniences you had to endure being kept all alone
& [?] eight months pregnancy before you. And what an
awful time you had the last few days waiting for him
to be born & on the day itself. And remembering how
terribly sad I was that I could not have been with
you shortly after Maxie was born. You were feeling
mentally physically relieved & happy. It was such a
gloriously happy moment after Lisa was born - & it
could have been even more so this time to know that
once again we had a baby safely born & perfect.
It is all very cruel - first I had to leave you neither of
us even knowing if you were going to have a baby or
not & then I am away & you are alone when he is born
& now the same againe when he is 1. And I have benver
seen him & the three of us have never been together.
It is difficult to console ourselves about so much but
we do know that we have immense & wonderful
happiness & joy & contentment ahead of us & the one
condition necessary is now for me to come home.