Mary Goss Diary

Tuesday, Feb. 23.d.

This has been an unhappy day to me. The feelings of my heart have been all day, what shall I do?

I see so much before me that I need and wish to learn, and time flies so fast; when I think of it, it almost distracts me. If were [illegible] it was only the present time, that I have to take care of, I should not feel so bad; but misimproved past time, stares me in the face saying to me, in thundering tones, redeem my precious, wasted hours. O that I could live my life over again from 12 the time I was 12 years old, commec ing at that age with the feelings I now posess.

We need to live one life, to learn how to live.

This has seemed to be a good day in Normalty with the teachers and the other pupils.

Mr P. read from some book about the importance of pupils in school having perfect lessons, so that when they are called to recitation, they shall come quickly, and answer promptly any question connected with the lesson, in whatever form it may be put to them. He then read from a report of the executive committee of the N.Y. normal school. This school has been in operation little more than a year. Messrs. Page, the principal, and Perkins, proffessor in mathematics. At the commencement of the first term there were only 29 pupils, but the No. has been increasing so that now there are 197. The state

pays the tuition of the pupil, and one dollar towards the board. The pupils on entering the school, have to pledge themselves, that they will teach a district school. 34 of them graduated last term, and 33 out of the No. are now engaged in teaching. This shows how faithfully their pledges are kept. Lectures are frequently given before the school, by the Principal on the responsibilities of a teacher.

The pupils assist in teaching, with a slight compen sation, instead of hiring assistants; by this means the knowledge they are acquiring, is reduced to practice.

Their governing maxim is, not how much but how well; and that books are but helps. Their constant and universal inquiry is, how shall I teach this to a child? And during recitation, this saying is often repeated; "if I were teaching this to a child, I would explain it so and so." The pupils are required to draft maps from the atlas at home, and then on the blackboard at school without it. Another recitation in Punctuation today, little better than usual, but dull enough. Our class in reading wide awake.

Miss Tilden is with us again soul and body, eyes too. Lucia leaves tomorrow. A sleigh ride is anticipated tomorrow, embracing the normal and model school. Would like to join it, but cannot.

Poor Ellen T. is very sick, and will probably go home tomorrow. Well, I written have written enough about tomor row, that may never dawn on us.

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Wednes. Feb. 24.th.

My normal sisters have just returned from their sleigh ride highly delighted, and feeling highly honored to think they have been through college. I almost wish I had been with them, for I have always wished to see the inside of Harvard college; but I could not afford it. I will cheerfully practice self denial in regard to mere pleasure and amusement, if I can have the means afforded me to gain useful knowledge. I have passed the afternoon very pleasantly, and I hope profitably.

Ellen Fowle has been carried home on a bed this afternoon. I fear she will be sick a long while. We miss her smiling face, and animated conversation. She is a very kind, affectionate girl. May the "Lord make all her bed in this sickness". and when she riseth from it, may she feel, "that it hath been good for her to be afflicted"

Exercises in school this forenoon the same as is usual on Wednesday. General question in Algebra from Miss T. Reading in the scriptures. I think the greatest fault in our reading, is want of life and character. It seems as if we did not feel waht we were reading, nor did not care about making others feel it. Short lessons in Gram and mental Arith.

I guess non of will complain of not having enough to do now Miss T. is with us. She is all, go ahead.

Thursday, Feb 25.th.

Miss Tilden often to us says to us after she has introd uced any thing new, now think about it, and study over it, and if you are faithful I shall know it the next time you come to recitation. Not always can she tell who the faithful ones are, if I know what faithful means; for sometimes when I think and study all day, and dream all night, about something she has told us; when I come to recitations, I appear as if I had not thought about my lessons. Is it because I have been unfaithful? It may be after all, perhaps I do not know how to think.

Nothing of note has ocurred today. I have heard 2 or 3 good ideas fall from the lips of some one, beside what we hear at recitation. One about education, that we are educating by every impression that is made upon our minds, Every thing around us is doing something to form our characters either good or bad; and we are con tinually doing or saying something, which helps to form the characters of those under influence our influence. How impor tant then it is, that we should live truthfully for the good of others, as well as for ourselves.

True friendship is a plant of slow growth. Mr Peirce. A short lecture from the Principal on order in little things. I do not blame him, Little things are an index to the whole character.

This is a bad page.

Friday. Feb. 26.th.

Truy, truly "true friendship is a plant of slow growth." When I first entered the normal school, it seemed to me that I should never love very much any of the girls; but how differently I feel now. They all seem dear to me, and some I love very much indeed. Even now the thought of separation is painful.

This has been a busy day. I have felt hurried every moment. I have been trying all day to understand about fractions, it seems just as impossible to understand them, as it would be for me to sit on a chest, and then try to open it. But I will do as dear little Anna C. told me too; "keep studying Mary, and by and by a thought will strike you just as it did me this morn; and everything will seem just as plain to you as daylight." Charming girl.

Some beautiful sentiments were read this morning; but I could not remember them all, they were so long. "Imitation is the sincerest flattery".

"Virtue is the nobility of angels; the majesty of God." Mr Peirce seems to think his pupils are not interested in the model school as they should be. I think we ought to be from selfish motives if nothing more. The model school is a recommen dation for the normal school. It speaks loud for us.

My heart is a complete school heart.

Sat. Feb. 27.th.

At home, the very best place on earth, the longer I am absent from it, the dearer does it seem to me when I return.

But I find though my body is here, that my heart is at Normalty. The interesting session of this forenoon is still fresh in my memory. I think it was the most pleasant season I have spent within its walls.

There to seemed be an unusual degree of love and union between the teachers and pupils. The question, whether compositions should by before the [illegible] of them before the school The question before the school for discussion was, whether it was expedient for pupils to read their own compositions before the whole school: All seemed interested in the question, and it was discussed with a good deal of life and animation. Miss Lincoln added her large mite. The question was decided in the affirmative.

My review lesson in arithmetic to me of the Seniors was most miserable. I am almost discouraged about fractions, but I will try again next week and see what I can do.

Miss Longly, one of the juniors left school today, on account of ill health. I pity her to have to leave in the middle of her term.

Another month and week's account is sealed.

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Sunday in Lexington

Attended meeting this forenoon heard an Unitarian Minister preach from these words, "Thou shalt love the Lord thy God with all thy heart and soul and mind" Mark 12th. 31st. and also from Prov. 3d 6.th. "In all thy ways acknowldge Him in all and he shall direct thy paths" 1st. What it is to love God with the whole heart. 2.d. the benefits to be derived from loving God with the whole heart. 3.d. In what manner we should show to the world that we love God.

To love God with the whole heart is to give him who is invisible the supreme affection of our hearts. But how can we comply with this tremendous requisite to love a being of whom we can gain no knowledge by our senses? This question causes many to stumble. Infidels content they cannot love a being whom they cannot touch feel or who is invisible. But they will not exercise that faith which is the foundation of our religion and bilieve that God is and that it is our duty and interest to love Him. We can see nothing of [our?] hearts or affections with which we are required to love God, and do love temporal and seen things. We know nothing of them except by their operations their operations and results. But is it any less certain that we possess these hearts and affections? A person

who denies his power to love the invisible God must, to be consistent, deny also his power to love any seen object with his unseen affections. They mystery of the one is as great as the other. We must have a supreme regard to God in all our ways, and because there is a mys tery in loving God, we should love and reverence Him with the greater profoundness. The benefits to be derived from loving God. 1st. If we love Him he will control us. We are week sinful beings we need divine wisdom to govern or us we shall be led astray. We need the consolations of religion in every period of life in childhood, youth and in old age, in life and in death. If religion shines on our path, our life is like the ladder jacob saw, crowded with angel's feet ascending and descending, so filled is it with gratefully acknowledged blessings. Death comes not to the christian as it does to the infidel, an extinguisher of life, but as a passport to a happier, nobler, purer life.

To say a person is truly pious is the greatest encomi um you can bestow. The [illegible], pious and piety, have been greatly abused I mean by them truly religious and moral. Some separate religion from morality, but they are inseparable Religion is the foundation of morality, no man is truly moral who is not pious We talk of giving a children good moral instruction, instilling into their using sound principles, but what are good principles and sound morals without a religious foundation.

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There a three ways in which we shall manifest our our love to God and his cause. By our actions and conversations and by these two united. He who has but little religion will be most likely to talk a great deal about, it using many pious phrases but he who possesses much will be very modest in his expressions, like a good old divine who had lived a godly, loving life, being asked one day by a pert young misister if he really thought he had religion, he calmly replied, I have none to speak of.

Love to God and man is the whole christian duty, if we possess the first, the last will follow as a natural consequence.

I received your note just in season Mon eve to decide my going to the Teachers Institute. I had been doubting the expediency of writing attending for a fortnight I was just deciding not to attend as I received your note it turned the scale.. Could you see the gratitude which now swells my heart as a member of this Institute

Surely we enjoy, a "feast of reason and flow of soul,"

March 23.

Commenced attendegd the Teacher's institute this morning. We assembled at the appointed hour and heard an opening address from Horace Mann, giving us his wishes respecting the manner of procedure during the session. He remarked that the Teacher's institute should be an exemplification of what a school schould be.

He did not wish to confine us to a code of laws neither did he approve of any teacher of common school confining their scholars to one. They would be likely to refer to this as their standard instead of their consciences.