1865-XX-XX_Letter-B_Alvord-to-MyDear_PS

National "Freedmans' Savings and Trust Company," AMERICAN EXCHANGE BANK BUILDING, No. 87 CEDAR STREET, NEW-YORK, 1865

P.S. 2^d

Could not Samuel go when he is say 10 years old, & live with strangers? I mean those who are known to be good people. Every body says St Pauls is the place for him—Mr & Mrs Markland (Col) had a long talk yesterday with me on the subject—They lived there once, many very remarkable cures, they assured me, had been effected there.

I will pull up stakes & go & live there (finding something to do) if you say so. Or try it for a year or two—

I am not at all sure but that Ann Lane, if you should write her, would be willing to have Sammy, when he is a little older as a boarder—Think of this seriously.

Saw Gen.l Howard about Lewis business but he assured me as I expected, called yesterday on Gen.l Hancock to see if he would do the thing but he was anxious—J. W. A

National "Freedmans' Savings and Trust Company," AMERICAN EXCHANGE BANK BUILDING, No. 87 CEDAR STREET, NEW-YORK, 1865

After all, it is at the present moment quite uncertain which of all these institutions I may permanently work for—Perhaps all—Perhaps only for this Bureau—it may be for the Tract Soc. I am not so put out as you may suppose after all, I can do any thing Charly made known to me as duty. A few more weeks ^will probably decide some grave questions now pending & give me ^somewhere more of exact responsible routine I hope so.

As to salary, I hope ^{expect by help of a kind providence} in some way to get enough to give me beloved family the simpler comforts of life. This is all you must expect. If I was pastor, withmy health, it would ^could only be in some place where only ^but a pittance would be allowed me, I could not fill a large place, nobody would give me 2500 or 3000 dollars salary as pastor. I must continue to obtain about this sum by some such side issues as I have been at for the last 20 15 years, and this brings me to the question of home life—1^st In the above case I could be at

home, but should we not starve? 2. I could shut up to the pavements ^{of N.York.,} & cold shouldering, & cringing hat in hand to pastors for their pulpits. I could be a beggar all my lifetime for many to ^be used in Boston (dont know how long I sh. live)—This would keep me somewhat at home say half the time—To be complained of however for not building up the Soc. as I might. But this I could bear, as at Boston they would have the night to complain. My duty would be quietness & harder work.

(Do you know that no pastor in NYk. or Brooklyn, with the exception of one or two Congregational houses, ever ask me to their pulpits. Did I ever tell you that from 3000 Circulars ^{(sealed letter)} with a personal note with ⁱⁿ my name appended directed to Presbyterians—Baptists Episcopalians—Lutherans ^&c on the N. Yk field only one or two individuals even responded in any ^{way. Such is the general indifference to the Soc.} & they were all sealed letters) Shall I work more broadly? is the question.

This absence from home is as painful to me as to you—more so, for I am the special sufferer. I have looked all over Washington more than once to see if we could not live here—And yet if the present indications of Providence are followed & you are properly supported it seems as if I must

come home often at least, & travel more or less.

You cannot consent to this I see. Could you if living in Brooklyn? Or will you try it here? Or, will ^you advise me to give up all this great work for Freedmen & the country, & be Agent in N.Yk?

But I have written enough for one letter—I am sweating with only shirt & trousers on as I write. We will talk ^it all over when I come—Gen.l Howard says he is very homesick grubbing along as he does also—with his family away

Yesterday went to Baltimore on special business—Bounty moneys of which Freedmen had been defrauded—Brought back information on which there will be a thorough investigation. But I had a very hard day in the heat—Write me once more—before I come

Yours as ever J. W. Alvord

P.S. What good men told you I was acting very strangely?