Mary Goss Diary

Jan. 8.th. It is said the first step towards gaining knowledge is to be convinced of your ignorance. I am convinced of mine, and aston- ished at it, but I am very thankful I came here. My mind has been continually receiving new ideas today. I have never studied nor been taught any of the elementary [beaches?] as they should be. It is good to be humbled.

The Sentiment given this morning was excellent but I cannot record it. It seems to me as if those pupils who have enjoyed the privileges of Normality for a year or more ought to be very grateful, and very wise.

I hope I shall not cause an unhappy feeling in the hearts of any of my teachers. Their trials and cares must be very great.

How beautiful to look at the consequence of always acting upon the golden rule as our Principal suggested this morn - may it indeed be a reality. I behold with admiration the order and systems with which the school is carried forward, but I have hardly become initiated yet. This day's account is sealed; all its moments have not been improved as should they should be. How selfish it seems to write about I so much.

Tues. Jan 13. th. I find I must put away thoughts of home and friends, and put my whole soul to study, if I would improve. I wish I felt a perfect freedom to ask questions, or express my thoughts before my teachers and the pupils.* Admired Mr Pierce's remark that we should be as liquid, soul flow into soul. let the knowledge of one be the knowledge of the whole class, seek to improve each other. Let everything be done in a kind of spirit. Every one be candid and frank. We juniors reproved for staring, and negecting our recitations. Inattention and impolitness were the faults which we are to guard against in future. I have learned that there is vast difference between knowing a thing and knowing how to express it intelligibly. Surely it is very important that a teacher should learn to express her idias clearly and quickly. Sentiments. The soul of man is the cabinet, the grace of god is the jewel: Christ will throw away the cabinet where he finds not the jewel. *[in pencil] Have you got this right? [Last?] sixty diamonds minutes set in a golden hour, no reward offered, for they are gone forever. Just recieved a good hint from Miss [Forole?], never do or say anything here in the normal, school that you cannot explain. [In pencil] And why not? You should so feel.

Jan, Sat. 17.th Sat. noon and the time allotted for school this week is passed. To me it has been a pleasant termination. I did not think last Sat. that I should ever be so happy here as I am now. Truly I can say it has not been in vain that I came here. The exercises have all been interesting and useful. I hope the Principal will continue reading from his journal, I think it is time well spent. The renewal of our Arithmetic to ex seniors was very profitable to us, found that I had forgotten some things that I had been taught. Can see from this, the necessity of reoccuring our lessons. Every time we repeat our lessons, they are impressed deeper on the mind. It needs a good deal of courage to take a part in the general conversations. The question for discussion today, was one of practical importance today. Should dull and bright scholars be kept together in the same class; or should they be separated. Some difference in opinion prevailed Most thought however they should not unless there was a great disparity. The dull scholar should be encouraged and aided out of school. The good scholar should not be made to feel his superiority. P.M. At home, have realized all the pleasure anticipated, but shall willingly return to Newton Mon. May tomorrow prove a profitable Sabbath.

Mon, Jan, 26

Everything went badly this forenoon, I did not feel very well when I first got up. Tried to do some sums in Algebra but could not understand them at all, I begin to think "Algebra is the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen."

In my Arithmetic could not say 2x2x2x2 I pity, sincerely, Miss Tilden that she is obliged to teach one so dull as I am, but I could assure her of one thing that I always do just as well as I can.

When I came to recite in Physiology I found I had left my abstract at my boarding house, but very fortunate ly, Mr. P did not call for it. And to put on the (climex) I missed two words in my spelling. What a commencement of the week! I do not have time to think how I would teach, it takes one all the time to learn. I think a great deal too much about the approbation of my teachers. I know I am too from a scholar to have them think well of me, so I must be contented without it. It is very natural that they should love good scholars best. Pride, selfishness envy, must be entirely subdued in my heart. I will look to the Block that is higher than I. Have had a dear kind note from the guardian of my childhood and youth.

She writes,"( sure) up new ideas for me as well as for yourself" Heaven bless her. This page might as well be blank.

Wednesday, Feb. 4.th. For some unaccountable reason, I do not find it as easy to write in my journal now I did it first. I might fill out these pages very easily light trifling things not worth recording, but I wish to write something, that will be of use to me in future life. This sentiment from the Principal this morn. God is love, and he who dwells in love, dwells in God. Truly, "love is the fulfilling of the law" such love as our Savior manifested while on earth, so pure and disinterested. disinterested is a word that can hardly be applied, in truth, to the human family. I think there was remarkably kind spirit, \pervading the hearts of the pupils in ??????. We shall have great need of this spirit when we become teachers, if we would gain a good influence over our scholars. Nothing endears us so much to each other, as kind words, and actions, and these must be the result of kind feelings. We have had only one session today as as usual on Wednes. Had an exercise in scripture reading, mental Arith, and Gram. I valued Miss. Tilden's instructions highly, very highly, when she was here, but I did not know how to value them as I ought. "Blessings brighten as they take their flight." heaven grant that Miss T. May soon return to us again.

Thursday, Feb. 5.th.

All things have been done decently and in order in Normalty today. Our hearts were made glad, this noon, by the arrival of Miss Hagar, who will be our teacher in Arith. and Algebra, until Miss Tilden is able to come back again. Miss H. manner of teaching algebra this afternoon was very much like Miss T.

Sentiments given this morning. A content ed mind and a good conscience, will make a person happy, in any condition of life. Rachael Emerson.

Past labor, is present pleasure. Caroline Smith. We reviewed in Physiology this morn. I think this study has been of the most practical use to me, than any of my studies, I like it very much.

But thou, O Phonography! art the - plague of my life; I can see no use, nor beauty in thee. Thou art an intruder, trying to rival our own pretty, smooth, writing and printing, with thy ill shapen pot hooks and trammels. But I will be patient a little longer, before I judge thee too hard, for perhaps upon a longer acquaintance, I may like better thee better.

We practised writing music on this afternoon the board today; difficult, but useful.

I am sorry we cannot read more, but I do not know how we can, every moment is improved.

16

Saturday, Feb. 7.th

Home is not so good a place to write, as is to talk, and even if I did not wish to talk, I do not feel like writing, for I am discouraged about my lessons.

I thought last night if I indulged myself in the pleasure of going to the concert, I should be sorry for it before Mon. morn, and it is even so.

Sat. night has come and my lessons are not learned for Mon, therefore my mind cannot feel as free from anxiety on the coming Sabbath as it should.

I was interested in the reading and discussion of this forenoon, and intended to record some new ideas, that I heard, but have no heart for it now.

The school was visited by 4 gentlemen, a thing of rare occurrence to see 4 men in one forenoon here in Newton, and I am glad it is so, for I wish to see none but the Principal while I am studying. To have as little interest as possible in things without Normalty, will give us much better success within.

I hope tomorrow will prove a day of rest; my mind needs it. I will try and "lay every care upon Him who careth for us".

Monday, Feb. 9.th.

Rose at 5 oclock this morning, determined if possible, to leave home early enough, to be in season to enter school this forenoon, but just as we arrived within mormal walls, the door was locked, which expressed to us very emphatically, no admittance; so we walked back to our boarding place, to reflect upon the sad consequences of being a little, "too late".

I know it is an interruption to our studies to go home very often, but then I think the kind, happy feelings we have theire, benefits us much as studying.

A. M O. B. Alcott descended us among us, this afternoon from the higher regions, and colder ones too I should judge from his looks, to communicate to us some intelligence that he had learned during his residence there.

I should have thought he would have been bewildered, to appear before such a company of beings made of flesh and bone. Quite complimentary to Normalty that his first descent should be within its walls.

He proposes to take the pupils with him, in his aerial flights, I hope he will not lend in so dark and mysterious a way, that we cannot follow. He is a little antinormal. I like him very much, I hope he will visit us again.

A short sing this afternoon. Pretty good beginning for the week. May it prove a useful week.

17

Tuesday, Feb. 10,th.

After devotions this morn, we were favored with another communication from Mr Alcott.

I hardly hknow what to do about recording anything he said. I did not fully comprehend all he said, but I was interested and excited and felt very glad to find I had some sympathy with his feelings. I thought I could find some passages of scripture appropriate to his statements, and as proof of the truth of them, but he does not use such simple language as Jesus did so that, "he who runs may read". How can he make himself useful to the illiterate and unlearned, he seems afraid of common langauge, and of common things.

Mr A. commenced by saying "that piety was the source of all culture, and that piety consisted in the giving up of the whole soul and body, to the spirit of God, and that the spirit of God is always with us, whenever we will open our hearts to receive it.

He then spoke of the good and mighty influence of a person who posessed this divine this piety, or whose heart was filled with divine love. A truthful teacher exhibits in her life this divine love, humanized, and endeavors to enlighten, and open the minds of her pupils, to receive this divine love. We cannot have a clear perception of divinity without the exercise of great self denial.

All the faculties of the mind and body, should be held as sacred gifts from God, and employed only

for His glory. But the world of mankind as it now is, are so grovelling in their desires; that they have made them selves as roots, descending lower and lower into the earth, forgetting that they should branch out, and upward, into higher regions. The body is the work of art, the soul is the artist. The human face expresses the language of the soul. Nature, the countenance of God."

I would thank Mr Peirce to be very free in making corrections in my journal, To make one correction if it was is needed, will do me more good, than an expression of approbation, a dozen times, even if I deserved it.

Sentiments given this morning. As the diamond can be ground only by its own dust; so the soul can be only degraded by itself. E. Fowle.

One hour of justice, is worth 70 days of prarer. Mr A. said he thought actions were prayers, but I think prayer is necessary, to prepare the mind for right actions.

The teacher's success depends very much upon the first impressions made upon the pupils, on entering school the first day. Principal.

Transcendentalism, the abscence of [cunt?]. Dickens. Strange, this sentiment should have been given in this morning.