Diary

life really has no crap in it. I'm alsmot afraid to say I like it. It is insecure. I get a great happiness when I think of God's security. Life not full without faith in God. Being in a simply living, yet highly efficient lifestyle, and very social one too, I feel empty if I don't believe in the security of God. I like having a good bike, racquet, etc. for its goodness and the simplicity of its being the best in action and beauty. The fact that others may admire, respect, love me, etc. is prompted by the good I direct in my life. But I have no total control in this. I am deeply grateful to God for the stuff I really like in my life. But I shall not dwell on it. it is time to move on tomorrow. To begin new classes, to live a life which will have ups + downs, maybe. I pray that I may

continue in peace and the gladness of truth, beauty, love. I cannot hold security in knowledge or facts for my mind is not one which can scan analytically. However, I shall plan ahead as I have in the past so that the future can be as great as possible. But this must be balanced with action. My feelings at the time will do this, simply enough.

But I wish to write a little history. I've never felt so free in my life. At home all my belongings are well organized at home and the categories are simple. Their spatial placement is well defined. The only other place I have anything is here at Stanford at Serra, except for some things in some bank vaults. Materially life is simple.

The material products of my life are likewise simply organized. All my writings are organized and all my diary stuff is good and representative. However it only exists for grades 11 + 12 and the summer thereafter. All else was

either too upsetting, too dishones, or too incriminating to keep. It is destroyed.

But now I have reached a level of stability where I feel I can write openly. This is a great book for it! Whenever I want to write something like this I can. There are no boundaries. I can go for pages or paragraphs.

Anyway, all other papers, toys, marginally useful things, pieces of art, musical stuff, etc. is organized and well stowed. I threw away a lot during the recent time I spent at home. A lot of bad stuff or never used things out of my past boxes of circuit boards, plastic knobs, glasses, spectacles, etc. are all gone. What I retain is whatever is meaningful to me or is still marginally useful in some direct way.

Best of all is that the EDITX project is finished. Royalties are coming in but it works, the contracts are all drawn, and

the tapes, etc. are well made + well kept. I can return to just being a Senior now.

I'm going to finish up classes for EE, taking stuff for entrance to law school too, and also studying music. So I'll be finishing the Soc of England course if Zelditch lets me. The atmosphere just wasn't right at the U.W. during my minivacation.

I'm glad that this book will not even attempt to cover all of me. It will just say what I think is to be said, taking scarcity of time into account. It is not a law book. So much for now - maybe even not the most important is said. But what is said is important.

Oct 27 - I haven't written for quite awhile - things have been very hectic - but now I've settled down to a year of directing Stanford in Gov't, my classes, exercise (tennis/biking), getting a job, and sociality. I lost the ASSU senate race,

but had I not been disqualified for a small blunder of putting a poster on the Stanford Bookstore, I would have become a Senate alternate with only seven more votes. My disenchantment (which caused my campaign sloppiness) shows me I wouldn't have been too happy there. Instead I'll be putting all my extracurricular time into directing Stanford in Gov't. My goal was to find one extracurricular activity and I have found it and I have a potentially successful campaign behind me.

I only like to write in here when I feel I have it together. Tonight is one such time. It's late but I'm on schedule. I'm planning on being all caught up tomorrow. It'll be great. I must still, however, do my sociology paper, write a resume, etc.