Diary

When this is together I will write again. That is when I have my sociology grade, a transcript, have talked to the dean, etc. I will write again. Then I will write my thoughts on the last six years. I will at that time have my engineering school resume all written and typed up. The little blue books will be nearly clean. Now I Have a goal to work toward and will approach it fervently.

July 5, 1975

I have not yet received my grade in Sociology 143 and as this important element has not been defined on my transcript I will not write on "the past six years." Nevertheless, the paper was completed on June 30 and mailed in. Much has happened since Oct 27, 1974 and I will enjoy recounting it when things are well set, when I have learned my grade for that paper.

But I want to write about today before I forget the feeling. Perhaps putting it down on paper will upset it but I want to preserve it. Since I finished the paper, I have felt very free again and it is a real lasting feeling. I spent a few days with a friend, Scott Gillies, in Snohomish, for the first part of this July 4th week, the beginning of the Bicentennial year. When I arrived at his house, he wasn't in and since they don't lock their doords I could let myself in. I was told by a note to make myself comfortable so I had a few beers and began exploring his house. It was very "easy," beer caps by the fireplace, records on the daveno, things scattered hither + thither, no neatness. I was somewhat impressed and not at all ill at ease. I had finished SOC 143 after all those months, and so much had happened I could hardly believe that it was done. I had fun and when Scott arrived we soon had dinner and then a good evening. I woke up happy

and rested and Scott soon came in. The day was allright but I began to get bored. "Mellow" + "Easy" are nice but they stagnate. We managed to barely keep Tuesday interesting but it necessitated some televiewing. We did bicycle and play badminton at nite. But we soon lacked conversation. I was so bored, or unexhilarated, I could not eat dinner. When I wok up Wednesday, I stayed in bed long to figure out what was coming off. I didn't exactly but I got a feeling to just treat easiness with easiness. Scott didn't come up so I eventually got up and showered went down and was jovial and Scott returned the politeness. So we got along fine and after doing errands and watching "All my childrent" (May got shot!) we went to the arboretum. I unfortuantely landed someone Scott wanted, yet not intentionally. It was a bad scene. His comment reminded me of Ira ("not all that good looking"). This ordeal ended as we got to Steve + Randy's and went to the Breadline with them, and Steve's mom.

(Rember the six of us + the busboy!) Haha. We had a good time! Then we (Scott + I) went to Spags and I was bored to death as I had to sit with two more of Scott's femmy friends. Ugh! DIdn't last too long but long enough to realized Scott is out. Went to Mocambo and then to Shelly's. I had a good time there seeing several people. Then took Scott to his car + I went home. Rose late, came to these conclusions, did my routine, contacted [Dee?] about PDP-11 software and did other things, watched "Texas Wheelers" + went to Dancing Machine.

There I met Bob. He was tall 6' 2" and 190 lbs. He was the biggest, most suitable fellow I've ever known. It makes me realize how much I want someone who is as tall as I am and proportioned well. Bob is big with [trg?] chest, legs, and stomach, but not very muscular. He is a very communicating person, easy

to talk to. I felt very comfortable with him. He can't though, get all that hard but that's the way it's always been with him. The best thing was his huggability and his bigness. We slept together and I awoke around 10 and showered and got back to bed. I slept a bit but then just lie there and thought, thought how much better this was than Scott's. I also was very much at peace and relaxed. I held him and this went on till nearly 2:00 when we finally got up. He is so big and just right. He fits my character. I can hold onto him and feel good. I suppose because otherwise I know him and like him. He is on the same wavelength approximately as I am. His face is not exactly what I like because his eyebrows are too busy. But he is a man about my age. I do not feel I am a man. I am not big enough. I need to gain 20 pounds and in the right places. I am considering the advice of a health spa to improve my body.